Category: Book Reviews

Sex At First Sight by Richard E. Simmons III

Richard Simmons III has revealed the must understood and least discussed part of the culture of unrestrained sexuality and the hookup culture: the sexual liberty so praised and promoted is purchased at the cost of dignity, health, and intimacy. Those who have indulged in the culture are fighting many more sexual diseases than before, feel used and guilty for using others, struggle to develop relationships, and are feeling lonelier than ever.

Though Simmons presents the message from a Christian worldview, he cites numerous scholars, former proponents of the open sexuality movement, and other non-Christian experts who admit the truth of God’s moral regulations of sexuality despite their reluctance to follow Him. There are cautionary tales from college campuses and the therapists couch. Even those who encouraged the so-called sexual revolution have come to see that it did not grant freedom but became a prison. Feminists are seeing that the sexual revolution, far from freeing women, has made them more objectified and considered only for what they can do do please another, not for who they are.

Yet Simmons also presents the hope of escaping this culture, returning the dignity and peace of a virtuous life. He urges us to consider how God did not make sex dirty, as the critics claimed, but God made sex. It was a gift for man that, like other gifts, man has made an idol to his detriment. The Bible praises the sexual relationship in marriage as honorable and to be a pleasurable “knowing” of one’s spouse in a special, secret, and sacred way. The Bible also reveals the destructive consequences of an individual and society of sexual relations outside of that context.

I HIGHLY recommend this book. I’ve worked with so many young people for decades and heard the stories echoed in this book and have seen the impact, decades later, of people who followed this lifestyle when younger, whether they were people of faith or not. Everything in life has consequences whether felt immediately or in the far future. Don’t dismiss this important fact.

I woke up late one Saturday morning and read the whole thing before lunch so it will not be a long read but it is so packed with good information from secular and religious writers, therapists, psychologists, and people living in and recovering from this unfortunate social experiment. If you work with young people, or have children, read this book.

If you are a high school, college student, or past that age and are struggling with the emptiness, confusion, and loneliness that this life has brought PLEASE read this book. He will not preach at you; he will enlighten you gently and lovingly and show you the lies and ignorance that created this environment that is pressuring you and show you a great way of escape to find forgiveness, fulfillment, and true intimacy in a real relationship.

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