Category: Relationships

Do We Become Angels When We Die?

Many years ago I attended the very sad funeral of a young Christian couple who lost twins at birth. I was very surprised when I read the poem and message distributed at the funeral that described the parent’s joy knowing that their children were now guardian angels watching over the couple. Since that time I have known of other Christians who said that their grandparents were now angels watching over them. A very quick reading of the scriptures reveals that we do not become angels when we die.

I am not surprised that many people in the world believe that dead loved ones become angels to watch over them. The concept has been popularized in movies, television shows, songs, and books. Many years ago, studies of angels were very popular but often misguided as little has been revealed about angels but the things that are revealed contradicted much of this popular teaching. However, the foundation of a Christian’s beliefs is what is written in God’s word, not popular literature.

The Bible teaches that angels are created beings different from man, Psalm 148:2-5. In describing the superiority of Christ above the angels, the Hebrew writer describes angels as “ministering spirits sent out to serve for the sake of those who are to inherit salvation?” (Hebrews 1:14) In addition, the mission of Christ was not to serve the angels, especially those who fell, but to serve men, Hebrews 2:16. Christ will confess the name of the faithful before the angels, Revelation 3:5. Angels are special beings, different from men and when we die we do not become angels (or demons either). Likewise, angels do not become people.

To speak of our deceased loved ones as angels watching over us is entirely without scriptural authority and the Bible is the only authority on the spiritual realm. As a previous article noted, our dead loved ones do not watch over us as non-angelic beings either. They no longer have a part in this world.

Since you will not be able to help those you love after you die, either as an angel or spiritual being, do everything you can today to express your love and concern for them and especially to share the gospel with those who are lost. Once we have left this earth, we may be greatly concerned about the spiritual situation of people here on this earth but will be powerless to do anything to help them, Luke 16:19-31.

Do Not Ask The Dead To Help The Living

Dealing with the loss of a close relative or friend is one of the most traumatic things someone can endure. We sense the loss of their physical presence and the ability to talk with them frequently. If they were a source of encouragement and guidance their absence will make us yearn for their leadership. In desperate situations, some people have wasted money on mediums and others who claim to communicate with the dead in order to receive some final message or to maintain contact. I fear that many Christians are practicing this in a more subtle way and are, without realizing it, taking glory from God.

Some eastern religions have a custom of lighting candles and preparing food to appease dead loved ones. They will pray to their loved ones for help in their life. Christians have long answered this with an exhortation that such people pray to God who can truly help them. However, I am witnessing more and more Christians asking dead relatives and friends to intervene in the matters of this world. I have heard Christians attributing the strength they had to overcome a certain obstacle to a departed loved one—not that the loved one was an inspiration to them or something they were taught helped them but that the loved one was actively helping them. They may even pray for them to intervene with God on their behalf.

We must acknowledge that nowhere in Scriptures are we commanded or encouraged to ask dead loved ones to intervene with God on our behalf since Jesus is our intercessor  and He “ever lives to make intercession for us” (Hebrews 7:25). Nor do we find authority to ask them to watch over us daily or during a special time of need. Again, it is Jesus who can sympathize with our weaknesses and is the only at the throne of God’s grace that we can “receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need (Hebrews 4:25).” We should not make requests to departed loved ones, Bible characters, or other faithful brethren that alone should be addressed to the Father through Jesus.

Since this is the case, if we go to our deceased loved one–or anyone who lived on this earth–to ask help in a time of need, we are not only doing it without authority but it is an unintended insult to God who really can assist us. In the Old Testament God considered it an insult! Isaiah 8:19 says, “… should not a people inquire of their God? Should they inquire of the dead on behalf of the living?”

Those who are deceased have no power at all in this world. In the story of the Rich Man and Lazarus, Luke 16:19-31, the rich man was concerned about the spiritual welfare of his brothers. However, he could do nothing about them (v.26 says it was impossible for him to return). He could not teach them or lead them to truth. Even Lazarus was not permitted to return to help them. The clear teaching of this passage is that we sever our relationship with the world at death. Ecclesiastes 9:6 says we no longer share in the things of this world. Any person who lived on this earth does not have the power of God upon their death, do not have his divine knowledge, and no matter how much they loved us, God loves us infinitely more!

I do not want to be insensitive and and know firsthand the depth of pain one feels when grieving a loved one, but to say that the dearly departed are working among us reflects an ignorance of God’s word on this subject and takes much deserved glory away from God. We cannot honor our departed loved one by dishonoring God.

Do our departed loved ones become angels when they die? The next article will address this.

Giving Back

Sorry I haven’t posted recently. I was in Florida doing service projects for a week at Florida College near Tampa. I attended there and support their desire to provide a good education in an environment that encourages Christian values. I worked with several great people at what is known as the Labor Camp to help clean up, repaint, and provide enhancements for the school. All the work during labor camp is volunteer work by others who believe in what Florida College is trying to do.

Service projects are a great way to support a cause you believe in. Some people might not have a lot of money to donate to a cause but can provide some time during the year to help a cause. Some can provide money but realize that some projects require the work of volunteers to suceed. Doing such projects not only helps your cause get the support they need, you often develop friendships with people who share the same appreciation for the cause or organization, and the good feeling that comes with helping others.

If you want to get involved with helping others, there are several options. For example, your parents might know of some people at church who would benefit from a visit, working around their house or their yard, or a meal. There may be some things at your church that needs to be done: cleaning, yard work, helping with the teacher’s resource room, or other things that need to be done.

National organizations have activities to raise money and make people aware of their work such as American Cancer Society walks, American Heart Association Jump Rope for Heart, St. Jude’s Math fund raisers, etc. These provide great opportunities for you to serve others.

Are Virtual Friends Inferior to Physical Friends?

At the beginning of 2011, Simone Beck committed suicide after posting a suicide note as a Facebook message. As expected, the continued debate about true friendship and the value of online friends reignited. Having read several of these debates arising from various events, I believe the debate is primarily among those who are in their mid-20’s and older. For those who are younger, their friends have always included a blend of friendships made or partially developed through online communication: Facebook, MySpace, texting, email, etc. For older people, especially those who are not comfortable with, or have animosity towards, computer technology, these “virtual” relationships are suspect at best or an indication of the demise of civilization at the worst.

The article title is a little misleading because all the friends under consideration are physical beings though they may not frequently enter the physical space we occupy. The question addresses the most common way we communicate with these friends or where these friendships were formed: in person or online.

Many consider a friendship that is formed in cyberspace does not have the value of a friendship formed in “meatspace” (physical reality). However, devaluing an online-only friendship because it takes place through email, chat, or social networking sites reflects an “old world” mentality. Why is the relationship with the people who just happened to buy the houses around me or work in the same building considered inherently more valuable because of physical presence? Some neighbors and coworkers are nice people and I like them, but we have nothing in common but physical co-location. I have some online friends that I have not met physically, or limited encounters, but I enjoy communicating with them and feel a connection with them.

Why is sitting on a front porch talking about uninteresting info or gossip considered an inherently more valuable interaction than an excited chat/email session with someone across town or across the world on a subject that we are both passionate about?

Then there is personality. Although I do many public facing things, I am an introvert. It is difficult to call people out of the blue no matter how much I like them. I’ll call for business or to address an issue if a call requires it, but it is very difficult to call my friend to share a joke or ask what they did today. I will however check that person’s FB page and exchange email jokes or discussions. I communicate much better and exchange on a deeper level via the written word than through phone contact. Many devalue the email communication compared to the phone call. Other personality types need to have someone in front of them–physical presence–and do not enjoy the virtual exchanges as much. Neither personality type is the right one, just different ways of interacting with the world.

There are friends from high school, college, prior jobs, and cities I’ve lived in that I would have no contact with today if it were not for LinkedIn, Facebook, etc. because we are no longer in the situation that brought us together physically. Does that mean our continued friendship maintained online is plastic? Do I have to fly/drive across the company to get back into physical presence with them or call them weekly to turn it into a genuine friendship?
Of course I have people on my Facebook and LinkedIn friends lists that are acquaintances but we share some common interests and have good discussions. I don’t expect them to drop everything in my hour of need but I’m sure they would show concern and many would offer genuine help if I needed it. But I had those same kind of relationships in high school, college, and every place I worked–physical co-location and communication methods were irrelevant–but no one questioned the value of those relationships.

Remember this when spending time with friends: If you are spending time with friends physically, don’t interrupt that time to interact with people online (email, Facebook, Twitter). That’s just rude. If you are at the birthday party–be at the party. If you’re having dinner with friends–be there. If you need to step away to help a friend through a difficult crisis through a phone call or text, do that. But that’s an issue of courtesy and respect for those with you and has nothing to do with technology or the value of the friendships.

In the Simone Beck story, many criticized the lack of help by those on her “friends” list on Facebook. However, upon reading the article, it appears that Simone Beck’s “no local” FB friends (therefore not real friends by some people’s estimation) were trying to get phone and address info to help her and urged the local “friends” (physically co-located and therefore “genuine”) to act. http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2011/jan/05/facebook-suicide-simone-back

What is your answer to the title question? Do you have strong relationships with people that you only know through online interactions?

Be True To You

The thought of being caught in a lie is bad enough. Imagine if you were a religious leader caught in the lie. Now imagine that it made the national news. Recently, a pastor was found to have lied having claimed for many years that he served as a Navy Seal. He apparently talked about it during sermons but was found out when a news organization reported his story and real Navy Seals exposed the lie.

I feel pity for this man who felt he had to create a lie about his past yet there are many people who do this. It is especially sad when a religious leader feels he must do this. One quote from the article really bothered me:
“We deal with these guys all the time, especially the clergy. It’s amazing how many of the clergy are involved in those lies to build that flock up,” said retired SEAL Don Shipley.
 

Of all people, those who are close to God should feel confident in who they are and honor the truth above all things. You should never feel like you have to claim to be something that you are not. Sometimes you can be tempted to claim that you are the best at some sporting activity, video game, or other achievement in order to impress people. You may feel the need to brag because you are around people who you may feel are better than you (though you might not admit it).

 
First, remember that we all have different strengths and weaknesses.The people that you might percieve as being better than you in one area may be weak in an area where you are strong. Even if were not the case (very doubtful),

http://www.flickr.com/photos/mountainbread/249455237/
by MountainBread via Flickr (Creative Commons)

you shouldn’t feel inferior to anyone. We are all made in God’s image and are unique. Remember, that when you lie about who you are, you are wanting people to like someone else. When you are honest about who you are, if they don’t accept you, consider it a blessing. You don’t want to spend your time trying to be something you’re not to live up to a lie.

 
Second, remember that the child of God must not lie (1 Timothy 1:10; Revelation 21:8).
 
Third, remember that your sins will find you out, Numbers 32:23. Like the pastor in the story, eventually people will discover your lie or you will get tired of living the lie and will finally tell the truth. Often, liars will contradict themselves and people will discover the lies. At other times, people just don’t believe someone who claims to be the best at everything. If nothing else, you will know the truth.
 
Be true to yourself. You are a special creation of God and you do not have to pretend to be someone you are not. You will be loved and accepted for who you are. You do not have to pretend to be anything for anyone.